Monthly Archives: February 2013

10 Reasons the Elderly Are Not Like Little Kids

I’ve heard it my whole life, the notion that elderly people are a lot like little kids. I know regression takes place over the final years. I’ve seen firsthand how Father Time eventually subtracts some of the most basic skills, … Continue reading

Posted in babies, grandparents, humor, preschoolers | 3 Comments

Rose-Colored Glasses on a Someday Badass (So You Think You Want to Be a Mom?)

My daughter wants to be Angelina Jolie when she grows up. That’s not how she puts it. She doesn’t even know who Angelina is. But she’s been telling me for years that she wants to “adopt nine or ten kids … Continue reading

Posted in daughters, humor, motherhood, speed-posts | 5 Comments

Whack-a-Mole: Parenting in an Intrusive World

Poop-slinging is not just for primates. I know, because I experience it as a mom firsthand all the time. I’m not talking about literal poo once flung at me by kicking baby legs—technically, that’s not slung. I’m talking about the … Continue reading

Posted in advice, government, humor, motherhood, poop, preschoolers | 7 Comments

I Don’t Like Big Butts, and I Cannot Lie

I had a few ideas brewing in my mind today for a blog post. I was going to blog about a little twiggy teenage girl rear-ending my car yesterday, and how my first impulse—so new and foreign to me—was to … Continue reading

Posted in beauty, body image, daughters, kids say the darndest things, motherhood, Past life, sons, speed-posts, vomiting | 23 Comments

Colic, Sleep Deprivation, and the Dangers of Dogma

When I was pregnant, I didn’t read parenting books. Seasoned moms said my instincts would be all I needed, and I believed them. Babies sleep. Babies poop. Babies eat. You put them down when they’re tired. You change their diapers … Continue reading

Posted in motherhood | 17 Comments